Make Your Next Chapter
Your Best Chapter!
Individual therapy for grown-ass women
navigating change in New Jersey
They say life begins at 40. It also begins to get real.
Tina put her dreams on hold to raise her family. She has no complaints, but lately, they don’t need her like they used to, and playing a supporting role in their story isn’t enough for her.
She can feel them pulling away, making their own plans – the early pangs of an empty nest.
She tells her friends she’s looking forward to this new chapter, but the truth is it fills her with dread. She doesn’t know who she is without her family needing her.
Lizzy had been dating Mark for ten months. At 42, she thought she’d finally found “the one.” Then one day, without warning or explanation, he broke up with her.
It’s hard to describe the absolute shock of abandonment. She knew he wouldn’t call, and she wasn’t going to call him. Her friends were great about listening, but she could sense she was wearing out their patience. And they couldn’t answer the big question: why?
She became an Internet detective, scouring the web, triangulating his social media.
Jessie is no stranger to change. They grew up queer in a place where that word was an insult, so adaptation was a matter of survival. Nevertheless, they triumphed.
They went back to school in their 30s. And now Jessie is entering a field where they can help others accept and celebrate the brilliant spectrum of identity.
But that final paper! They can’t seem to get it done. They agonize, they procrastinate, they can’t stop re-writing. Argh!
As the deadline looms, their anxiety mounts. Old feelings of fraudulence and inadequacy haunt them.
Your story matters.
Now is the time to tell it.
Therapy can help you write a better story.
Tina used to be a badass. She isn’t ready for plaques that say, Live, Laugh, Love. A day of “self-care” found her wandering the mall, purchasing an overpriced candle for a bath she’d never take. She came home in time to make dinner for a family that wasn’t there.
She threw the candle into the garbage with extreme prejudice. Then she called me.
Lizzy drove herself crazy trying to solve the mystery of her vanishing relationship. It gave her purpose – albeit a manic, falling-down-a-rabbit-hole kind of purpose. She couldn’t turn the page until she pieced it all together.
Then, during of one of those late-night sleuthing sessions, he texted her. She felt a nauseating mix of horror and hope. She wasn’t sure how to respond, so instead, she reached out to me.
Jessie, like many creatives, is a world-class catastrophizer. With one misplaced comma, Jessie is convinced they will blow the assignment, never graduate, and end up living on the street – friendless, loveless, a total failure.
Jessie knew this was about more than the paper. But the clock was ticking. The deadline didn’t care about their underlying issues. In desperation, they reached out to me.
Change – the good, the weird, the unfair – happens.
You don’t have to face it alone.
Tina wanted to be seen as an individual, not just as someone who exists in relation to everyone else. She needed to tell her story without fear of judgment and begin to explore the roots of her discontent.
Through our sessions, we found that by reexamining her old, internalized myths about motherhood, she began to establish healthier boundaries and rediscover her passions. In time, she was able to bring herself back to the center of her own life and step into the future with vitality and purpose. She no longer needs a plaque to remind her to live, laugh, or love.
Lizzy told me her story, and I listened carefully and pressed her for all the details she could remember. We spoke about the destabilizing trauma of abandonment and how it makes us question everything we thought was true.
Retelling her story helped Lizzy reclaim her reality. She began to recognize recurring themes connected to old hurts. I helped her change the questions she asked herself, and she was able to change her story. “Why did he do it?” became “What do I want?” And that midnight text? She answered it the best way possible: silence.
Jessie was being held back. After a brief consultation, we identified the obstacles that were keeping them stuck. Handing in the paper meant starting the rest of their life, and Jessie needed some support. There was a lot to process, but we had a report due, so we agreed to bookmark these root causes and return to them later.
Jessie trusted me to read the assignment, and I was able to assure them that the over-writing was anxiety, not editing. Jessie was relieved to discover they were closer to done than they thought. With some prompts, structure, and accountability, they finished the paper and graduated with their class.
*Tina, Lizzy, and Jessie are fictionalized composites of the stories of real clients with whom I’ve worked.
You’ve been everything to
everyone else for so long.
Now it’s time to show up for yourself.
Hi, I’m Robin.
Robin Shamburg, LPC, LCADC
I’m a therapist, writer, and grown-ass woman.
I love working with women in midlife. So much has happened, so much to look forward to.
It’s like you’re reading a book, and the plot starts heating up. Our heroine is slaying dragons left and right. You can’t wait to see what’s next. You turn the page and… it’s blank.
Midlife is when you realize that you’re the one writing the book. You decide what happens next.
It’s easy to get stuck here.
Your life has been about taking care of everyone else, and now it’s time to take care of you. But who are you? What do you want?
I’m here to help with that. Our sessions are all about you. As you tell your story, I will listen to you completely. Help you clarify your thoughts. Eliminate old emotional blockers. Challenge those internalized ideas about women and aging. And remind you what a badass you are.
I’m not the therapist for everyone. I can be raw sometimes. My story has taken me from Hollywood to the sex industry, and my language often reflects that.
I’m never judgmental, and always on your side – even when I’m pushing you forward.
This is your time. Your story. Let’s turn the page together.
